Wednesday, November 09, 2011
Last blogged @ 3:18 AM

Wonder

I am already tired of what's going on. Why after you're really close w' me, you treats my house like somekind of hotel or kopitiam, and you always leave me for your friends. Did i treat you this way? If i were the one treating you this way, you'll hate me. Yes i always got this thinking like you're just mine, no one elses. But whenever you're going out w' your friends, i gets really paranoid, you can do so much things behind me which i wont know yet you can also deny, and maybe i was the one always being fooled by your lies. So i was thinking like, maybe when you're gone, i wouldn't feel this way anymore, because its like when i'm with you, im feeling very paranoid and sad. It was also like im having more unhappiness than happiness being w' you, and i always tell myself that,two person being together is to be happy, but i was feeling otherwise. Until now, you still don't understand me, so who are you to me? My boyfriend, or just my friend when you has got no one to go to then you came to look for me? Sometimes i really feel like letting go, cos all along im having sorrows, not happiness. If there's a day when i dont bother about you or not stopping you from anything, you must understand that I've gave up on you, i no longer love you and belong to you. But don't blame me, because i gets tired too, and you really disappoint me utterly much. Why're you treating me this way? When i hits you many times, means i've got something in my heart which i couldn't be able to have courage to tell. I thought i don't needa have friends, just with you all along, but all along i was wrong. You weren't always the one for me, sometimes i dread to face you.. I'm working for myself now, i wouldn't will spend money on anyone again, but yes still, my bestfriend and families. Even if i spend on you, i don think you're gonna appreciate it. Now that im working, i've met new people and im also going through different lifestyle w' different people. Can you not leave me for your friends when you're alr at my house, and i thought you would accompany me, but i was wrong. Yes i admit that you and your friend has got more memories than me, they are much more important to you, but can you treat me special? I feel that I'm also like your friends, thats why i would feel upset all the time. Yes i am just a girlfriend of yours, someone who weren't important to you. Now that im working, all i want is also sometimes one whole day with you, but no you doesn't give. "I am jealous of people getting close to you especially when you show them the real you. It's not that i am selfish,im just afraid that you'll be too happy with them & you'll forget about me" I bet you felt this way either..

Labels: Tired of loving.